yeloson: (Wheel of Racism)
yeloson ([personal profile] yeloson) wrote2009-01-08 10:21 pm

Not Lies

1. Not History.

I've been thinking for the last few weeks about Not History. Not History as most of the words which are communicated, from school to TV to common books. Not History as lies, not history as myths, not history as our word counts more than your word, not history as omission.

I've been thinking about red blood of red people misread by white eyes with red eyes. I've been thinking about the lies of the cheery negro, cheery Injun, cheery chink-coolie, and every other smiling POC that exists as a myth, exists as a servant, exists as a doll, exists as a bellhop, exists as a lie shaped over people shaped to fit a lie less we lie in a grave.

2. Not Smiles

The smiling, lying, not white person. We cannot speak what our history, our voices. Our past is carefully censored, carefully chosen, to best fit their smiles, but not our own. We're melaninated Jesus- we smile upon as we bleed, we forgive you for the genocide, the rape, the torture, the words we cannot speak to our ancestors, the stories we don't remember, we forgive you for filling us with self hate so we want blue eyes and beat our children darker for being too dark.

No we don't. But not we is who you think we are. Who you need us to be. Otherwise, we're too angry and where does this anger come from? In your not history where you not killed us, not took us away, not abused us, our not people should be smiling. Thankful even.

3. Not People

Us, who we really are? When we're not the roles you made for us in your not history? We're not people. After all, people get to say what they feel. They get to have a history, a voice. They get to have rights. You feel sympathy, sorrow, anger, love for people. You relate to people. You do not relate to us. We're just human forms walking around, tools, furniture, whatever role you've carved from us in your not reality.

4. Not Us

And when we cannot fill your role? You fill it for yourselves. The white shaman, guru, kung fu master, santero, jazz playing, latin dancing, belly dancing, zen shiatsu, yinyang yoga, tantric, MC, kickboxer, American Ninja, Last Samurai, Dances with Wolves, Love Guru, Charlie Chan, David Carradine, blackfaced, buckskin wearing, Lie.

You speak for Not Us with your made up voices. That real history, behind the not history? Not heard. And you don't know why we're angry.

5. Not War

War is when lots of people are killed. Or massacre. This can't be war because we don't really die if you don't see it. You didn't really kill us if you don't remember it. And you weren't murdering because you don't care enough to hate us. It's like cutting grass, we just happened to be in the way of your sunny day and your machine cuts us down so you can have a nice green, red, lawn.

At one point in your not history, you had enough to call it for what it was - manifest destiny. You believed it was your right. Now, it is your not right, and if anyone gets in the way, they're militant, irrational, hysterical and really why don't they go back to where ever they came from. After all, they're not American.

It's not war because it's police shooting not people in the back. Over and over. It's not war because you can't not give aid to not people after Katrina. It's not war because you can't give rights to not people in ICE concentration camps. It's not war because you can't pollute the homes where not people live.

6. Not Over

We're not. Because we're not you. When you let us speak, when you stop speaking for us, when you stop making decisions for us, when you stop punishing us for not being you, when you stop killing us for not being you, when you stop, when you stop, when you stop being you.

Maybe then we can talk about us.

Until then? I'll be not listening to you.

Re: thank you for this.

[identity profile] yeloson.livejournal.com 2009-01-11 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
It's cool as long as he: a) lists credit (Chris Chinn) and b) provides the link to this post. I've had a lot of of trouble over the couple of years with folks taking my words without attribution (once it gets mailed out w/o your name, then it spreads like wildfire).