How to drive (POC, women, teh Gheyz) out of your hobby

[yeloson]

If you ever wanted to know why I walked away from most of the Indie RPG game communities, this is it, right here.

It's not just that there's a few assholes.

It's the way people just sit there and watch you get dogpiled, who say nothing.

Then show up 10 months later, "Dude, I felt bad about that. Hey, when are you going to write some more articles on Gamism?"

Hell no do I want to help you out or play with you when you watch me get dicked and then make nice with the same people who just shat all over me.

Comments

[skywardprodigal.livejournal.com]

t's the way people just sit there and watch you get dogpiled, who say nothing.

Then show up 10 months later, "Dude, I felt bad about that. Hey, when are you going to write some more articles on Gamism?"

Hell no do I want to help you out or play with you when you watch me get dicked and then make nice with the same people who just shat all over me.

It in a nutshell.

[kialio.livejournal.com]

Simply amen.

[color-blue.livejournal.com]

In my language people like that are called cowardly racist idiots, which in whitefailspeak is translated as people who are nice and progressive really.

I'm sorry you went through that.

[yeloson.livejournal.com]

There's this phrase in those circles, "Reading Charitably" which means to try to read someone's posts in the BEST POSSIBLE LIGHT, which is good in theory, but interestingly applies towards being nice to assholes more than asking assholes to be nice in return.

(nevermind kyriarchial power differences or anything like that...)

[tekanji.livejournal.com]

...which is good in theory, but interestingly applies towards being nice to assholes more than asking assholes to be nice in return.

This.

If someone is being an asshole, it is better to call them out as acting like an asshole than to extend an olive branch. Not just because the olive branch does nothing but condone their behavior, but also because those whose side you're supposed to be on will see you siding with the person who antagonized them. Which is fine if you are okay with being on the same side as an asshole, but after you side that way you can't complain about being called a bigot. *grumps*

[maradydd.livejournal.com]

Delurking to say thanks for introducing me to the term "kyriarchy", which I find both a fascinating and an unfortunate word.

[tekanji.livejournal.com]

In my language people like that are called cowardly racist idiots, which in whitefailspeak is translated as people who are nice and progressive really.

It scares me how true that sentence is.

[franzeska]

Yeah, being able to say, "No, but the lurkers really do support me in e-mail!" doesn't exactly make up for having to take on every single asshole on the internet by yourself.